Here's what SA secretly fantasises about doing between the sheets

From mom-in-laws to vending machines, survey reveals that anything goes

18 December 2019 - 00:00 By staff reporter
Fantasies about having a threesome were most popular among respondents of the 2019 Sunday Times Lifestyle Sex Survey.
Fantasies about having a threesome were most popular among respondents of the 2019 Sunday Times Lifestyle Sex Survey.
Image: 123RF/Georgy Kopytin

Would you tell a curious chatbot the intimate details of your sex life? More than 4,000 South Africans did just that when they completed the 2019 Sunday Times Lifestyle Sex Survey.

It turns out that Mzansi is fairly happy with their sheet-shaking antics. On average, respondents rated their sex lives a respectable 7 out of 10 — but that doesn't mean they don't think about spicing things up.

When asked to describe their ultimate fantasies, 25% of respondents' replies involved having a threesome. Fantasies of a romantic nature were the next most popular (17%), followed by thoughts of doing the deed in public (14%). Daydreams about BDSM (13%) and roleplay (12%) rounded out the top five.

From the sweet to the saucy, here are some of our respondents' secret sexual fantasies, in their own words:

• "Two men as my submissives, catering to my every need," - single heterosexual female.

• "Sex with a colleague or client at the office. The excitement of being caught would make me climax," - bisexual married female.

•  "A threesome with one woman, one guy and me ... preferably a guy of a different race group," - heterosexual married female.

• "Sex under the stars in the middle of nowhere," - heterosexual single male.

• "Sex on a packed club dancefloor," - heterosexual married female.

• "Literally f**king a vending machine," - heterosexual single male.

• "Me, my wife and the Maldives," - heterosexual married male.

• "Having a picnic naked in the bush where no one would see us," - homosexual married female.

• "To watch a couple having sex (without them knowing I'm watching)," - heterosexual married male.

• "Sex with a stranger in a public area," - heterosexual married female.

• "To have sex with my wife and her mom," - heterosexual married male.

• "Sex on the beach at night," - heterosexual married female.

• "Three differently sized girls at my apartment with my camera rolling," - heterosexual male in a relationship.

• "Roleplaying from the start of a date right up to a hotel room - and keeping it going after sex would be really cool," - heterosexual single female.

• "I would love to join the mile-high club," - heterosexual married male.

•  "A gangbang with celebrities," - heterosexual male in a relationship.

• "The whole lady-in-a-trenchcoat vibe," - heterosexual single male.

• "Bondage, whips and hot candle wax," - homosexual single female.

• "Sex with a pregnant woman," - heterosexual male in a relationship.

• "To watch my partner having sex with someone else, while someone else is having sex with me right next to them," - homosexual male in a relationship.

The 2019 Sunday Times Lifestyle Sex Survey was run in conjunction with Ratepop. Answers have been edited for clarity.